What is wrong with me? Anybody..???
Assalamoalaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuhu,I don't know but I ask you, what is wrong with me? Why is devil able to overtake me so easily? why am I letting go? Why still with the tears in my eyes, am I unable to hold back myself? Why is it that the darkest side of me wants to show up so anxiously? Why is it that I feel so empty? My emaan is on the lowest of levels,,, what has happened to my heart? It is turning black? I feel horrible.
Who wants to be misguided after they are guided? who wants to become a recipient of hell after they have become a recipient of heaven? I want to just run away or hide in some corner. I don't want to say it but I can't help. I want to see no body around me. My friends are being taken away from me. It is like a programming,,, when I am left alone, it is easier for Satan to attack me. Audhobillah!
See once again, I don't want to write it with this in my mind that people will read and appreciate it or call me a wonderful person for questioning my intention,, but this is happening. Disclaimer*:This is not for people. These are my inner thoughts. What I am going through. And hopefully because none knows me personally,, it shouldn't even be a problem at all inshaAllaah.
My heart has become weak. It seems to be dead. I fear Allaah,, but I don't know what it is that is making me feel just horrible. I can't handle it right now. It's like if I am about to break down. Ask Allaah to save me. Ya Allaah,, You know I don't want to be like that,, who wants to be misguided after You have given them the most beautiful gift of guidance? Ya Allaah, You know what I have done in the past few days, weeks, and hours. Ya Allaah, Save me from satan. Ya Allaah, Save me from satan. Ya Allaah, Save me from satan. Ya Allaah, keep me under Your protection. I need it the most Ya Allaah, I want to be protected under the cloud of mercy You sent towards me. Ya Allaah, make me one of Your most obedient slaves. Ya Allaah,, fill up my heart with taqwah just as my eyes were filled with tears. Ya Allaah, Save me from this duniyah and its evil. Ya Allaah, Grant me Jannat-ul-Firdaus, and a house in the neighbourhood of Your beloved Prophet SAW.
Audhobillahi Minash shaitanirrajeem!
posted by Allah's Slave @ 3:54 PM
6 Comments:
I think, my humble opinion, that you should turn to the "wazeefah".
Turn to Allah through His Book.
Assalamoalaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuhu,
JazakAllaah Khayr for the humble advice. Indeed, that wazeefah works faster than we think! Doesn't it??
Remember me in your duas,, that I die when I reach the peak of emaan. Amin Thuma Amin.
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Feeling and knowing that you are doing mistakes is the first step to correct them :) Don't feel down because it's from the human nature to do mistakes and that is how Allah created us. Tawba and istighfar are the solution and of course duaa'.
May Allah lead us all to the right way.
Empress 2
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if we were not to sin, then Allah wopuld take us and create humans who sin and return in humility and repentance to him,,
All the sons of Adam are sinners and the best of sinners are those who repent
repent quickly and dont delay,, repent make 2istikhfar and pray the 2 rak3ats after your sin
do worships make thikr,, read quran
stay away from transgressors stay away from all that brings shaytan
keep good friendship,, attend circles of knowledge
there is always a way out and you cant run away from Allah coz in the end you will stand before Him
sin is there to tell you that you arent so great and you are weak, to break your nafss and your pride and to show you that with out Allah you are nothing,, and that it is only te grace of Allah and his mercy over you that he covers your ills that people dont see
return to Allah and Allah is always pleased with His slaves returning to Him
May Allah make me and you of those who listen to the thikr and follow the best of it
salamu aleykum
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